Of the flavor, I have no complaints. It is everything else.
I believe my least favorite fruit is the banana. (The name descends from the original Hawaiian word for “cylindrical zit, a.k.a., pus log”) Hear is my “rule of tongue”: Any fruit the you can “chew” by smashing it with your tongue against the roof of your mouth is plainly off limits for my digestive system.
Really, I have no complaints against those that enjoy a good banana periodically. In fact, I encourage you to be true to the original form of consumption. To truly experience a banana, you need simply to bite off the back end, forming a small hole opposite the stem. Then, starting from the stem, squeeze your fingers around the fruit and pull towards the hole like a tube of toothpaste. Enjoy the concentrated white pus that comes squirting out. That’s right. Like a bloated zit that bursts a chunky glob of tasteless paste in your direction. Mmm, mmm good.
2 comments:
Oh, My, Goodness! HOW did I miss that you had a blog?!
I have never really cared for a banana...they are also my least favorite fruit. However, I grudgingly eat them to stave off muscle spasms after a workout. It will be the ONLY reason I ever eat one...until now. The mental pictures flashing through my mind - that your blog entry provided...I believe I will pass..from now until forever!!! Thank you.
Yay! Bananas!!!!
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